- Notes -

In this page, I'll just write wathever comes to my mind, if I feel like writing.

My therapist told me to do it, so why not

  • (music) - ??/??/2022

    I've been waking up with this song playing in my head - November - Psychedelic Porn Crumpets
  • (music) - ??/??/2022

    Now I just want you to know that if don't know the band up above, you're a war criminal, check this song - Cubensis Lenses - Psychedelic Porn Crumpets
  • (music) - ??/??/2022

    The past few days I've been learning to play this song, I like how good I feel when listening/playing it - My Sweet Lord - George Harrison
  • (notes) - 05/12/2022

    In these past few days I've been doing the Advent of Code code challange, It's great and I totally recommend it. Here are my answers for the 2022 and 2021 challange.
  • (notes) - 14/12/2022

    These past few days I've been feeling quite sad, maybe overwhelmed with my current "social cicle", I feel like god brought to me a beatiful oportunity, and I'm throwing it away, throwing everything away, sorry God, maybe I'm not ready to your blessings.
  • (notes) - 18/12/2022

    Depression is hitting really hard this december, some stuff happened in my personal life and I honestly don't want to write about it, I just want to forget. I don't feel like waking up anymore, I don't get happy doing programming, I'm just really fucking sad, but glad I don't want to die like in the past.
  • (notes) - 20/12/2022

    I'm thinking about creating a nodejs script for adding stuff to the website pages. If I do so it could be quite useful for other people, here is the website github repo. It would also be a way to try fighting depression, better than medicines.
  • (notes) - 09/01/2023

    Happy new year for everyone, I know it's late. I spent most of the new years eve alone, sleeping, I can't really communicate with my family, just with my mother. People I love sent me a happy new year message, it made me really happy! I don't feel better right now, but I do have some hope and I will try to live better in 2023 than I did in 2022.
  • (music) - 09/01/2023

    Here is a good song I'm listening right now: I Didn't Know - Skinshape
  • (important note) - 09/01/2023

    Borzoi's are my favourite dog breed now! They are so cute, I love all of them (I guess...)

    Image of a happy girl!
  • (notes) - 10/01/2023

    Depression is fucking horrible, I started many programming projects since my vacation began, but some personal stuff happened in my life that made me kinda miserable... I can't find any reason to wake up before 12PM, or to sleep before 5AM, stuff that used to make me happy just don't. (fuck writing a correct english btw.) I don't think about killing myself anymore, that's a good thing, but why do I feel so empty? Why do nothing makes any fucking sense? Why do I keep having panic attacks alone in my house? Why the fuck am I so weird. And to make thing worse, people expect good things from me since I'm """intelligent/gifted""". I can't have fun like my friends, just playing games or watching movies/series, I get bored, but the things that I love to do just don't make sense anymore, I feel like a failure, sorry God.
  • (notes) - 16/01/2023

    Just for a quick update, I'm feeling a lot better now than I was in my last post. For 4~5 days, I trained 5 hours per day of muay thai! I feel a whle lot better doing this.
    One other thing, I always write stuff in this website late at night, now it's 01:30 in the morning, but the majority of the notes were written at like, 4~5AM.
    And I want to write about good things here too! Not just the bad stuff y'know, I'll improve on that. I'll try to write weekly reports for my projects.
  • (notes) - 30/01/2023

    Life is good. These past few days I was being too harsh with myself, as a note to me in the future: Just live your life man, do things that make you happy and stop thinking too much about the future. It's like that Nietzche thought experiment in which a demon shows up in your room at night and says, "You'll live your life, exactly how it is for ever and ever" and shit, I don't have much time to write bcs I'm going out to solve some stuff but the message is
    don't force yourself to do nothing and be happy (:
    Also, I found a really good website to download anime lol -> nyaa.si.

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